this post was submitted on 13 May 2026
595 points (99.0% liked)

People Twitter

10008 readers
1021 users here now

People tweeting stuff. We allow tweets from anyone.

RULES:

  1. Mark NSFW content.
  2. No doxxing people.
  3. Must be a pic of the tweet or similar. No direct links to the tweet.
  4. No bullying or international politcs
  5. Be excellent to each other.
  6. Provide an archived link to the tweet (or similar) being shown if it's a major figure or a politician. Archive.is the best way.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 162 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Mark woke up to the rays of the sun streaming through the slats on his blinds, cascading over his naked posterior. He stretched, his flanks lifting with his glutes as he greeted the sun. He rolled out of bed and put on compression shorts, the sinews of his haunches prominently showing through the thin fabric. He bottomed buttingly to the stairs, and derriered downwards.

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 62 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That last line is incredible.

[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 103 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Thanks! It's all just adapted from the original:

Cassandra woke up to the rays of the sun streaming through the slats on her blinds, cascading over her naked chest. She stretched, her breasts lifting with her arms as she greeted the sun. She rolled out of bed and put on a shirt, her nipples prominently showing through the thin fabric. She breasted boobily to the stairs, and titted downwards.

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 31 points 2 weeks ago

Haha, I thought it sounded a little familiar.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Doing something buttingly sounds more amusing than doing it boobily.

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 weeks ago

Fits with the werewolf joke. But when our dog does it we call it bum scooting.

[–] reksas@sopuli.xyz 4 points 2 weeks ago

its even funnier if you know finnish. there is a word in finnish that is about that and it means something a kin to fooling around/doing something badly (perseily)

[–] prenatal_confusion@feddit.org 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Where is this from? I need it.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 31 points 2 weeks ago

Gay men writing men!

[–] FishFace@piefed.social 9 points 2 weeks ago

A furry wrote this

[–] MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

if you trade the compression shorts to a towel around his waist, you can sayHis penis bounced penisly down the stairs

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Oops my penis! Will someone get that for me before it gets out the door?

I swear it's worse than the cats

[–] Aqarius@lemmy.world 99 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

"He vampired billionairely across the room, his sweetly-softcore rapey vibes engulfed her small feminine self-inserty hair, she looked exactly like [you, the girl reading this], and he was very vampirey and mysterious"

[–] BigDiction@lemmy.world 23 points 2 weeks ago

Very mysterious indeed. I often ponder what runs through his mind.

Vampire Fantasy Football League

[–] groucho@retrolemmy.com 62 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Dan Brown writing men: "He had steely grey eyes and was very smart. Scientists thought he was an idiot but that's because he was smarter than them and didn't spend as much time writing papers. He did four hundred pushups and took a shower. 'Not bad for a fifty five year-old guy', he thought, which was smarter than other thoughts even if those thoughts had won prizes."

[–] pyre@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

that's hilarious

[–] RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip 61 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

His pecs bounced pecily as he swung his football bat.

[–] Aneb@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

Foot-long bat* Some call it a third leg but me

[–] OldChicoAle@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

Damn that's hot

[–] Rentlar@lemmy.ca 31 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (11 children)

I'll admit I have never thought about it before now.

what I'd never thought about before now

If a man were to transform into a werewolf... would his dick transform into a canine one?

[–] Winged_Hussar@lemmy.world 56 points 2 weeks ago

Hopefully

I mean, probably

[–] orenj@leminal.space 18 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Take a look at bad dragon's werewolf line, you'll find your answer

[–] ech@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Depends on who is drawing the furry porn and why.

[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 3 points 2 weeks ago

If you draw your werewolves with human-like dicks, can you even call yourself a furry?

[–] vzqq@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That’s the point of transforming, yeah? You get a wolf nose, wolf ears, wolf paws, and yes, all the rest of the anatomy.

[–] couldhavebeenyou@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 weeks ago

In France, they call it le buttox

[–] ParlimentOfDoom@piefed.zip 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I think this very much depends on where on the spectrum of the type of werewolf he falls. Are we taking Wolf-man basically just hairy guy with claws type, a monstrous bipedal wolf creature, or all the way to turning into a full fledged normal wolf but smart...

[–] AFKBRBChocolate@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Can we agree that even the first one would transform at least a little?

[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 3 points 2 weeks ago

Yes, but 90% of that would just be the pubes growing completely out of control.

[–] Battle_Masker@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 2 weeks ago

Depends on the author/artist

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 weeks ago

Of course, that’s one of the biggest draws to werewolf dude: Thicc knot!

[–] CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 weeks ago

What is weirder?

  • werewolf with a human dick
  • human with a canine dick
[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 5 points 2 weeks ago

Depends on what kind of werewolf.

Some weres look exactly like a normal wolf, and others are part human-part beast.

[–] tacosanonymous@mander.xyz 5 points 2 weeks ago

Ali Hazelwood would say, "Yes."

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

No his dick transforms into a tiny werewolf in a trenchcoat and fedora. It's really quite adorable.

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 26 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Expected a mirror to 'breasted boobily down the stairs,' but nope, monster fucker alignment chart.

[–] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Putting robots and furries on oppose ends of the spectrum seems odd given the sheer popularity of robotic and cybernetic characters in the furry fandom. Like, placing a protogen on that chart would get confusing.

[–] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 11 points 2 weeks ago

Chuck E Cheese is right on there, in the robot fucker super structure.

[–] groucho@retrolemmy.com 3 points 2 weeks ago

Odo, centaurs, and the Grinch just standing in the middle trying to avoid eye contact with each other.

[–] Siethron@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

You'd think being a Billionaire would be a turn OFF in this day and age.

Are people reading this erotica unironically class traitors?

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] HulkSmashBurgers@reddthat.com 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Isn't this basically what romantasy is about?

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

No. Where are the allosauruses. Allosaurii. Allosaurids. Dammit.

[–] sundray@lemmus.org 21 points 2 weeks ago
[–] kurcatovium@piefed.social 11 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

We need to focus on important things! Is that penis perfectly sized in a human or a wolf form?

[–] HulkSmashBurgers@reddthat.com 4 points 2 weeks ago

I'm guessing…both?

[–] couldhavebeenyou@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 3 points 2 weeks ago

Bristly for her pleasure

[–] IWW4@lemmy.zip 9 points 2 weeks ago

Well.. that was a rollercoaster!

HAHAHAHA

load more comments
view more: next ›