this post was submitted on 13 Oct 2026
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I'm doing great, honestly! Interacting with the awesome people on Lemmy, living life peacefully with my bf, taking care of the house...okay, that last part was a lie, I'm lazy af πŸ˜†

But really tho, things are going surprisingly well rn. I'm having fun living life. My E injection ritual (I'm fixing my levels, don't worry), my ritual of boofing prog every night, preparing food for my bf to take to work the next day. I even started taking a fiber supplement again and it's really helping! Despite the antibiotics, the kratom and my irregular eating habits, my digestive system really is healing! And of course, that means I'll be able to have sex again soon. And tbh...I can't fucking wait ❀️

Slightly NSFW, slight TMII even had an orgasm today, after a looooong time, lol. Thanks, trusty magic wand! I love you <3

Also the funniest thing happened to me today. I was standing by the kitchen counter, completely naked. My bf came up to me from behind, also naked. He started grinding against my butt, but as soon as he touched me, I got shocked by static electricity...from his fucking dick πŸ˜‚
That had us both rolling and it was a funny, wholesome couple moment for both of us 🩷

I'm having a ton of fun posting to 196. Hornyposting is amazing and I enjoy it so much, and having so many kind people responding, thanking me for my posts...it's honestly great. Thank you so much Lemmy. Truly, honestly, thanks for all the amazing safe spaces (communities) here. I love it so much πŸ’œ

I feel...alive. For the first time in a while, things are looking quite positive. I'm not dying from dysphoria, I'm not breaking down because of "bottoming issues", I'm not having relationship troubles...I'm not feeling hopeless because SRS is so far into the future. Instead, I'm looking forward to it ❀️
I'm not crying every day because I started HRT late, I don't spend every waking second hating my body. I look down and I see a pair of boobs. And honestly? That's the best feeling in the world πŸ₯Ή (well, sex comes pretty darn close πŸ˜†)
I love that I joined Matrix. I love chatting with friends from Lemmy on Element. I'm not alone and that's a very powerful thing to me. Thank you <3

I feel great. And I know, I know it's because of the drugs. I know things would be much worse without them. I fully admit to myself that I have a problem and that quitting will be rough. But honestly? I'm enjoying the moment. Quite a bit.

Thanks for being here, everyone. Thanks for welcoming me here, no matter what. Thanks for bearing with my frequent shenanigans.
I love you all so much 🩷

Side tangent: And thanks to the dev(s) of the Alexandrite frontend for Lemmy! Hands down my favorite one. I just wish that it would get updated on the blahaj.zone server, because the latest version actually supports uploading pictures, which is the only thing I'm missing. It's really not the end of the world tho. I'm sure an admin will get to it, one day ❀️

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[–] bloomnolia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

Honestly your posting, including the hornyposting, is fun as hell, thanks for contributing so much πŸ˜„ Really happy to see you've found your joy

[–] Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 3 hours ago

Thank you, I'm glad 🩷

[–] luciole@beehaw.org 0 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

That's wonderful Miisha! Music to my ears πŸ’œ

[–] Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 9 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago) (1 children)

Honestly, thank you <3
Love you sis 🩷

[–] luciole@beehaw.org 0 points 5 hours ago (2 children)

Love you to Miisha! Getting called sis, it gave me a teary moment. I’m so very touched

Crying cat

[–] Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 5 hours ago

I'm so freaking sorry 😭
I totally wasn't paying attention. I fucked up baaaaad 😭😭😭
So sorry...

[–] Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

WAIT NO, I DID A DUMB
I'm so sooorryy 😭
I'll delete it

[–] luciole@beehaw.org 0 points 3 hours ago

can you... put it back, can I be sis? pls i’m not kidding πŸ₯Ί

you're awesome sis ! love you 🩷

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 0 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

I see your memes all the time and I love them. Thank you for posting. :)

[–] Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

I'm glad. Tysm! ❀️
Side note, but I totally read your name as heparin, lol

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 0 points 4 hours ago

That’s what iPhone autocorrects it too all the time.

[–] apotheotic@beehaw.org 0 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I'm glad to see you're feeling a bit better miisha. Have you taken any steps toward therapy/diagnosing the mental health issues you suffer from, as others suggested in your previous posts? Its best to take action on these things while you feel good, since we often dont have the headspace when we feel bad!

[–] Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Thank you. Honestly no, I'm still waiting for my new therapist. This isn't a "step", but I've firmly decided NOT to go back to that psychiatrist. I mean, there are many reasons for that, but...asking my deadname as soon as I sit down? Holy fucking shit, fuck that lady
Thank you 🩷

[–] apotheotic@beehaw.org 0 points 3 hours ago

Well done for sticking to your guns! Make sure you take active effort toward your mental health goals x

[–] etaoin@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Yes I use Alexandrite too! It's great for slow internet connections, beyond initial loading time

[–] Miisha@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 8 hours ago

Yes, Alexandrite is great! It's pretty (imho), it works really well, it has all the features I need (except for uploading pictures, damn it 😭) and I like the sidebars!
And it feels more robust than Photon...Photon just breaks for no reason sometimes, or maybe I'm just unlucky.
Either way, you go, fellow Alexandrite user! πŸ’œ