I was an anarchist for a huge part of my life (most of my teenage years) and kinda began to get more connected with M-L and stuff like that, and I would call myself a marxist. Yet, everytime I talk with other leftist I either get called a tankie or an anarkiddie. If I recommend Das Kapital, I'm a state bootlicker or a left wing fascist. If I talk about how I prefer direct democracy but know that the process to communism is slow and needs some help of a state, I get called an anarkiddie. Anyway, I just find exhausting the infighting. I already struggle a lot with mental health just to be poorly treated by other people that, supposedly, want the same as all of us. Anyway you guys in lemmygrad have been always so nice, thanks btw. Have a nice week and thanks for reading my small rant.
I was once an anarcho-communist, a Trotskyist sympathizer, a Maoist, a generic "communist", on and on. It is a learning process, and we are all growing.
Don't let others' opinions on your beliefs shape them necessarily. Be cognizant of differing views, but I suggest trusting yourself first and foremost. Trust your own research, trust your own ideas, trust your own thinking skills, and don't let people confuse or confound you.