this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2025
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[–] chaosCruiser@futurology.today 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That’s a nice way to ask if I’m a bastard. No, not the insult. Literally, someone born out of wedlock.

[–] Chozo@fedia.io 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm a bastard in both senses.

[–] MyDarkestTimeline01@ani.social 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)
[–] MagicShel@lemmy.zip 13 points 1 year ago

I was 3 when I attended my parents' wedding. I guess I should note not my dad and birth mom.

I met my birth mom many years later. She stressed how she and my dad were briefly married when I was born, so I wasn't a bastard, and that she gave birth in FL, not MI — the only home I remembered — so I wasn't a damn Yankee. Like she did me some kindness in both those cases.

That was the attitude that led me to be quite happy with my circumstances — acting like I was in her debt over things I had no care over. So yeah, I attended the wedding of my dad and the only woman I'll ever call mom.

[–] GreyShuck@feddit.uk 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I was around 20 years too late.

They didn't attend mine either, as it happens, on the grounds that they too were "late" by then.

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Hey, this almost exactly matches my situation. Neat.

[–] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Am I a bastard?

Yes.

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 year ago

I would love to, but I wasn't born yet.

[–] reallyzen@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 year ago

In a way I did: shotgun marriage, she was 4 months already

[–] AsslessChaps@lemmynsfw.com 6 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The first wedding I ever attended was my father’s. The second ever was my mother’s. The third was mine.

[–] Blumpkinhead@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Congratulations!

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago

If you don't attend your wedding, then it's not your wedding!

[–] dunz@feddit.nu 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Yes, I'm the firstborn, but I was oneish when they got married, so I'm a bastard 😃

Also attended my mum's second wedding, about 7 years after her divorce from my dad. My mum and stepdad are still married 🥰

[–] RebekahWSD@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

They married ages before we were born. I attended my mother's second marriage. I wasn't invited to my father's second marriage because his mistress was and is a fucking asshat.

[–] GaMEChld@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My dad got remarried but I didn't attend that. Didn't see any point in honoring a ceremony that he already proved is meaningless.

[–] andrewta@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Did he cheat on his first wife?

[–] GaMEChld@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Cheated, secret other kid. The works!

[–] Tywele@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 year ago

No, my parents married 5 years before I was born.

[–] N00b22@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 year ago

It happened 6 years before I was born, so no

[–] Soku@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I never saw my parents together so for embarrassingly long I believed they didn't know each other at all.

I was a flower girl in my father's wedding at the age of 7. Bet his missis wasn't delighted but her crotch goblins were not out of the nappies yet. The party was fab tho, proper village long table with prolly about hundred people in the middle of nowhere with a lot of live music, food and vodka.

I was in my teens (living with my grandma the whole life) when my mother asked if I want to come to the nearest town for family photos on Saturday and I said yeah no, it's sauna day you know. Turned out I missed my mother's wedding because I had to wash my hair. Still joined them in the afternoon for my mom's birthday and as it turned out the afterparty. So yeah, technically I have attended both my parents' weddings.

[–] TheLeadenSea@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago

Obviously this is a highly created summary and you know the details of your life better than me, but from this is seems like more that you missed your mother's wedding because she didn't communicate properly, not because you had to wash your hair.

[–] ikidd@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

I was the 3-year-old ring bearer.

[–] isyasad@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

My dad didn't have a wedding when he got remarried, but he invited me to be there when the papers were signed. Then he did it without telling me 🤷‍♀️ so "no" I guess. One day he was just like "oh yeah we got married yesterday"...

[–] Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

No, they married only once, and it was before my time.

But later, they attended my wedding.

[–] megane_kun@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 year ago

No...? But I did the math correctly, and for a certain interpretation of "attend", I am a day too late.

[–] bizzle@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

No but I did when my mom got remarried

[–] Dasus@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago
[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 3 points 1 year ago

no, my mother got remarried while I was out of the state

[–] TabbsTheBat@pawb.social 3 points 1 year ago

As a younger sibling.. nah :3

I wasn't a reason for my parents misery, just a consequence of it

[–] dwemthy@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Not their marriage to each other, but I went to my dad's second wedding, when I was in my twenties. Nice guerrilla ceremony at an art museum

[–] remon@ani.social 3 points 1 year ago

They never married.

[–] Jerb322@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Both of their second....

[–] Lorindol@sopuli.xyz 3 points 1 year ago

Yes. I was almost three years old. I don't remember much, but I do remember that I started to sing during the wedding ceremony when my parents knelt at the altar. Of course no one else sung.

I also remember that the priest scared the shit out of me and that my godfather "fell asleep" in the toilet and had to be carried to a car. I learned years later that he had severe social anxiety which he treated with liquor.

[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Our son was 14 at our wedding, his bio-dad died when he was 3.

My biological parents relationship was transactional.

[–] palordrolap@fedia.io 2 points 1 year ago

Well, no, but in a sense, I kind of was. The ovum already existed and had for <mother's age at the time> years, but the exact sperm did not. I came along too much later for that to have been possible. But my DNA was all there. Just not assembled in the right order yet.

Alternatively, if you believe in reincarnation, I still might have been. I have at least one relative who was there who didn't make it to my birth. Maybe I'm one of them come back.

If that was a conscious choice, that may have been a mistake, but that's another story.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

My parents did one of those vow renewal weddings and I was at that. I was not at their original wedding. I wasn't born yet.

The only other wedding I attended was my own. And I kinda wish I hadn't.

[–] ladytaters@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Same, at least for the parents. I've been at a couple of friends' weddings and they were pretty delightful.

[–] PonyOfWar@pawb.social 2 points 1 year ago

Nope, that was 18 years before I was born.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 2 points 1 year ago

I did the math as a teenager, and yep, I travelled down the aisle.

[–] stoy@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 year ago

That would have been quite the logistical challenge

[–] konalt@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Not yet. My dad's wedding is next year.