this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2025
568 points (97.3% liked)

Funny

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[–] xylol@leminal.space 67 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Seems pretty normal especially solo hiking

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 27 points 10 months ago (4 children)
[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 19 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Either Mary or Kate, probably.

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 7 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] Revan343@lemmy.ca 0 points 10 months ago

♪ I fill you up ♪

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 4 points 10 months ago

- Empire TSA agent

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Mary Kate never existed. She was made up so that Ashley could pull two paychecks on Full House.

/s

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

She parent trapped us!

[–] xylol@leminal.space 13 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Mosquito's probably, they definitely need a machete with those around

[–] Metostopholes@midwest.social 12 points 10 months ago

The word paparazzi was originally used because it invoked a buzzing insect, and may have been derived from papataceo, meaning a large and bothersome mosquito. So in a way that's kind of true.

[–] NaibofTabr@infosec.pub 11 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] RedSnt@feddit.dk 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] atlas@sh.itjust.works 10 points 10 months ago

THEN WHO WAS PHONE????

[–] Duamerthrax@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

Her publicist.

[–] higgsboson@dubvee.org 45 points 10 months ago (4 children)

Respect. Imagine being famous before you can even form your personality? She has probably never felt safe in public in her entire life.

[–] FATALRPG@sh.itjust.works 13 points 10 months ago

The episode where her and Mary Kate went on Oprah has been scrubbed off the internet as much as possible, but it was fucked.

Both girls struggled with an eating disorder (let’s be real, any child/teen star does because they’re our societies sacrifice to Moloch) - and she asked them a bunch of pointed questions about diet and weight. Fucking ghoulish.

Don’t forget there were “countdowns to 18” for both of them, just like there were for Emma Watson. Disgusting.

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 10 months ago

The way they were treated in media was also fucking disgusting.

Is that why she bangs old men?

[–] plantmoretrees@lemm.ee 36 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Those kids got mind f’ed

[–] noobface@lemmy.world 16 points 10 months ago

ain't no one have room to judge. machetes and mimosas all day.

[–] Damage@feddit.it 19 points 10 months ago

I don't see the problem

[–] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 18 points 10 months ago (3 children)

Add a rope loop around the machete handle and your wrist. Just in case a "non-bear" tries grabbing it from you. Be vigilant!

[–] Revan343@lemmy.ca 7 points 10 months ago

Maybe a lanyard attached to the drink too. I don't anymore, but that, uh, would have come in handy on some past camping trips

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

a “non-bear”

Here we call them "twinks"

[–] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

Lmao, indeed. If they were the concern, she'd only need a pamphlet about Jesus vs the machete 😂

[–] BootyEnthusiast@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 10 months ago (2 children)
[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 4 points 10 months ago

I think they mean like a more clean cut gay man. Those guys are always snatching machetes.

[–] NotProLemmy@lemmy.ml 1 points 10 months ago
[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 16 points 10 months ago

What?! That's how I hike! (and no joke, though sometimes it's a rifle/shotgun instead)

[–] VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works 15 points 10 months ago

Imagine you're in the wood and accidentally stumble upon big game at close quarters. Michelle knows. Michelle's got this, dude!

[–] HertzDentalBar@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 10 months ago

Tbf that's pretty much the best way to enjoy the outdoors.

[–] Dumbkid@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 10 months ago

Usually my machete is sheathed but same

[–] Boomkop3@reddthat.com 10 points 10 months ago

Did you grow up some some sort of post modern thriller?

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Watch it rise like a souffle!

[–] demizerone@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

She's badass

[–] heyWhatsay@slrpnk.net 5 points 10 months ago

Very relatable, I have spent much time in the woods with a beer in one hand and a machete in the other. If anyone is concerned, I just tell them I'm waiting for the zombies to show up.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 4 points 10 months ago

I feel seen