this post was submitted on 21 Jun 2025
568 points (97.3% liked)

Funny

15692 readers
1080 users here now

General rules:

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
 
all 44 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] xylol@leminal.space 67 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Seems pretty normal especially solo hiking

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago (4 children)
[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 19 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Either Mary or Kate, probably.

[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] RickyRigatoni@retrolemmy.com 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Revan343@lemmy.ca 0 points 1 year ago

♪ I fill you up ♪

[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

- Empire TSA agent

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Mary Kate never existed. She was made up so that Ashley could pull two paychecks on Full House.

/s

[–] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

She parent trapped us!

[–] xylol@leminal.space 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Mosquito's probably, they definitely need a machete with those around

[–] Metostopholes@midwest.social 12 points 1 year ago

The word paparazzi was originally used because it invoked a buzzing insect, and may have been derived from papataceo, meaning a large and bothersome mosquito. So in a way that's kind of true.

[–] NaibofTabr@infosec.pub 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] RedSnt@feddit.dk 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] atlas@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 year ago

THEN WHO WAS PHONE????

[–] Duamerthrax@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Her publicist.

[–] higgsboson@dubvee.org 45 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Respect. Imagine being famous before you can even form your personality? She has probably never felt safe in public in her entire life.

[–] FATALRPG@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 year ago

The episode where her and Mary Kate went on Oprah has been scrubbed off the internet as much as possible, but it was fucked.

Both girls struggled with an eating disorder (let’s be real, any child/teen star does because they’re our societies sacrifice to Moloch) - and she asked them a bunch of pointed questions about diet and weight. Fucking ghoulish.

Don’t forget there were “countdowns to 18” for both of them, just like there were for Emma Watson. Disgusting.

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago

The way they were treated in media was also fucking disgusting.

Is that why she bangs old men?

[–] plantmoretrees@lemm.ee 36 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Those kids got mind f’ed

[–] noobface@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago

ain't no one have room to judge. machetes and mimosas all day.

[–] Damage@feddit.it 19 points 1 year ago

I don't see the problem

[–] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Add a rope loop around the machete handle and your wrist. Just in case a "non-bear" tries grabbing it from you. Be vigilant!

[–] Revan343@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 year ago

Maybe a lanyard attached to the drink too. I don't anymore, but that, uh, would have come in handy on some past camping trips

[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)

a “non-bear”

Here we call them "twinks"

[–] RubberElectrons@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Lmao, indeed. If they were the concern, she'd only need a pamphlet about Jesus vs the machete 😂

[–] BootyEnthusiast@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

I think they mean like a more clean cut gay man. Those guys are always snatching machetes.

[–] NotProLemmy@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 year ago
[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago

What?! That's how I hike! (and no joke, though sometimes it's a rifle/shotgun instead)

Imagine you're in the wood and accidentally stumble upon big game at close quarters. Michelle knows. Michelle's got this, dude!

Tbf that's pretty much the best way to enjoy the outdoors.

[–] Dumbkid@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 year ago

Usually my machete is sheathed but same

[–] Boomkop3@reddthat.com 10 points 1 year ago

Did you grow up some some sort of post modern thriller?

[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Watch it rise like a souffle!

[–] demizerone@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

She's badass

[–] heyWhatsay@slrpnk.net 5 points 1 year ago

Very relatable, I have spent much time in the woods with a beer in one hand and a machete in the other. If anyone is concerned, I just tell them I'm waiting for the zombies to show up.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 4 points 1 year ago

I feel seen