this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2025
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No Stupid Questions

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Its the 14th century and you've had no time to prepare, after you're done reading this post you are snapped. What do you do?

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[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago

Well, I would give you the answer, but since I snapped back as soon as I read the post, I'm now responding what has been 650 years later for me, and I'm too fucking old for this shit a second time. I bypassed getting snapped back this time by just not reading the post and coming straight in to comment.

Now, what will happen if I read the

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (9 children)

I'd use my knowledge of the future to do two chicks at the same time

[–] MissJinx@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

well I'm a woman so anything I do will be witchcreaft. I would probably try to get to north america in some way and warn them "the fuckers are coming".

that would mess up the future lol

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[–] tiredofsametab@fedia.io 1 points 1 year ago (5 children)

If I snapped you back in time 650 years

2025 - 650 =1375

Its the 12th century

1375 is the 14th century. Which do you mean?

Answering the actual question, nothing good would come of it if my location on earth didn't change. Being the only white person in rural northern Japan well before Europeans came in the 1500s would probably not be a good situation for me. The language, at least the written one, was very different. Being the Nanboku-chō era, things would probably be not great since it was in the midst of 60ish years of war with two different people claiming to be in charge. I can't find, at least before my coffee kicks in, exactly what kinda state Mutsu Province, as it was then called, was in at the time.

[–] AmidFuror@fedia.io 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's not 1825 where you are?

[–] tiredofsametab@fedia.io 1 points 1 year ago

Technologically, it does feel like that sometimes, but it would seem not.

[–] otp@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

English would also be unrecognizable in 1375. At a glance, it seems like it was Middle English, which means you'd probably get as much intelligibility with any other English speakers as a monolingual Dutch speaker would have with a monolingual English speaker today. Maybe a bit closer, but still.

Shakespeare was still hundreds of years away.

...Not that any of this would matter to anyone living in North America.

[–] yoevli@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Middle English is certainly difficult to understand, but most words still bear some resemblance to modern English. I think it would probably be more like a native German speaker trying to understand a heavy Bavarian dialect, or at worst a Dutch speaker trying to understand the same.

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[–] treadful@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 year ago (6 children)

I'd make some fucking soap.

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That’s 1375.

Not good, not bad. Depends on where you ended up on the globe. There absolutely is civilization, but it’s all kings and Tsars and the like. The English and French Hundred Years War is winding down but the plague really did a number on Europe. Lots of war in India. It wasn’t a great time in the Middle East what with the Crusades and all. The Egyptians are conquering Armenia. The Songhai Emprire is growing in Eastern Africa. Southeast Asia had a lot of conquest and a large kingdom growing, might not have been so bad as long as you landed on the winning side. The Ming Dynasty just started in China.

So it’s not like you ended up in pre-civilization or among dinosaurs or something. There are plenty of people around, but it’s still an age of war and conquest. Your best bet to have a great life would be to ally yourself with a strong leader and give them advancements to help that leader “win”. Of course, if he were defeated, you’d be slowly tortured and killed by the opposing side.

[–] biofaust@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (10 children)
[–] Kookie215@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Now you're a witch

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[–] PahdyGnome@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

As an Australian I would struggle significantly unless you were to also transport me geographically.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Fuck I think I could just vibe with the Noongars, hunting, fishing and sleeping til I died of old age.

Maybe use basic science and chemistry to improve sanitation and quality of life. Not too much, just enough to be regarded as a clever fella, not a warra wirrin bad spirit.

[–] ptu@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I would imagine the east coast / tasmania could be interesting. There used to be hundreds of different peoples that are now extinct and we know nothing about. A struggle nevertheless.

[–] P00ptart@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I would teach London children the most obnoxious brain rot slang from today as a laugh.

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[–] LordOfLocksley@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

England is in the midst of the Hundred Years war with France and considering I'm ~193cm and the average height of a man in England in the 14th century is about 171cm... looks like in getting my arse drafted and shipped off to France, to act as some kind of intimidating presence. That is until I have to swing a sword, which my body, that's used to sitting in an office looking over excel spreadsheets, absolutely can't do, so I get bum rushed/hit in the face with an arrow and die.

That's the most likely scenario.

Worst case scenario, considering I don't speak middle English or Latin, I'm treated as an enemy and locked up in a dungeon somewhere.

I don't think there is realistically a best case scenario

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[–] ultranaut@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Assuming I am physically in the same place, I will fall to my death. If I somehow survive the fall I would be severely injured and alone in the wilderness. Within a few days I would probably die of either my injuries, dehydration, or hypothermia.

[–] SendMePhotos@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Scientifically speaking, the earth is constantly moving in an upward spiral. Your exact physical location would put you in some random outerspace area without oxygen or any protection. Just floating in space until you die.

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[–] captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'm on the Gregorian calendar, 650 years ago is the year 1375. I'm in North Carolina, so if I were to snap back in time at my present location I would be a blue eyed white guy in pre-contact North America. And while I think I'm an above average candidate for the Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court scenario I'm not realistically able to start "from scratch." I'd probably make it the summer on forage and my own body fat. I don't picture encountering the natives going particularly well, for me or them. I'm not sick and I'm vaccinated against a lot of shit but watch I'll give them 6 centuries worth of influenza updates.

I don't think it would help that much being plunked down in 14th century England; we're talking Geoffrey Chaucer's lifetime here, to them I'd sound insane. Modern English is a few hundred years off. If they didn't trepan me to let the demons out of my skull and I didn't die of smallpox, I'd try to invent the electric motor 500 years early and be burned for heresy or some shit.

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[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I'll probably die of dysentery. Just because I know modern hygiene rules doesn't mean I'll survive interacting with all the other people who don't but are used to local bacteria and viruses.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

i mean i don't think it would even be that difficult to just always carry a bar of soap with you and make sure to boil your water and only eat well-cooked food, and wear gloves as often as possible.

sure people would think you're silly and annoying but that's a pretty cheap price to pay for not catching terrible diseases.

[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It would help to at least try doing that, but in practice this would probably be very difficult - it's likely not possible to always drink boiled water and well-cooked food, and given the possibility of contaminating food and drink after boiling, you might effectively have to prepare all your drink and food yourself, which is logistically difficult given the length of the work days. Diseases also spread in other ways, like smear infections (e.g. on toilets, doorhandles, tools) and airborne infections.

[–] andrewta@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is probably the most realistic answer. Either you die quickly or you’d wind up, spreading some major contagious disease that nobody has a defense against and wipe out a huge section of the population.

[–] gibmiser@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

spreading some major contagious disease that nobody has a defense against and wipe out a huge section of the population.

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[–] Dagwood222@lemm.ee 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I know thousands of songs. Also, musical instruments like the saxaphone haven't been invented yet.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 year ago

honestly this might actually be the best idea, for most of human history people have been absolutely bored out of their minds and sharing news/stories/songs and really any sort of entertainment has been a perfectly legitimate way to get free food and housing.

any of us could almost certainly just live as travelling bards and do side jobs for actual monetary pay, provided you can get over the embarrassment of performing for an audience, and of course learn the local languages and translate the stories you remember.

[–] Kookie215@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Oh I think you're the first person to suggest music! That is a really good idea, provided you don't die of dysentery of course.

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