Editor's note: this is a post about American Independence Day celebrations
existentialmemes
Alright, I'm going to launch explosives around your house. For several hours. Yes it is dangerous and terrible for wildlife and the environment. And yes your pets will get sick from eating the debris and you will feel terrorized inside your own home.
No you can't opt out of it. Everyone is doing it and frankly it's weird that you don't want to.
No you can't be the one launching the explosives you need a license for that. You can however launch these marginally smaller ones though. Yeah just whenever you want. 2am sounds great.
So anyway, fireworks were a mistake and it's never too early to start reminding you of that.
PSA do not mess with additives other than Titanium for salutes. Ideally do not mess with improvised explosives at all but if you really are hell-bent on upping the noise, a string-bound blackpowder maroon is the way to go. Hello interpol my old friend.
The real way to get on the list is to give advice on how to acquire salt peter or acquiring in bulk precursors like ammonium nitrate (or is it nitrite, not going to look that up)