this post was submitted on 23 Jul 2025
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What I picture in my head when I hear the term manspreading is the guy on every bus or subway who is sitting in a middle seat with legs spread wide. It could also be arms around the backs of the surrounding chairs.
Yeah pretty much the jist of it.
Tbf I see teenagers do it a lot too but their brains aren't fully developed yet.
You know men tend to be larger than women?
I had a live-in partner complain that all the clothes in the laundry basket were mine, implying she was doing most of the laundry. I looked. We wore the same amount of clothes, mine were just bigger, taking a larger volume.
Size doesn't make you spread your legs, blocking two other seats or make you wrap your arms around the back of the other seats. I've seen plenty of men who can keep their hands and knees in front of themselves.
But .. it does? If you’re tall, your arms and legs are longer, so they stick out further. As I found out on an 11 hour flight where the people to my left and right decided they both needed both arm rests, it’s painful to sit with your knees and elbows touching each other.
Wrapping my arm around a seatback would have been a godsend.
Alright, I see the problem. I'm describing how some men literally spread their arms across the back of multiple seats and how some men literally spread their legs out so that each knee is blocking access to each seat beside the and you are interpreting that as people complaining about guys being allowed to use their armrests. No one is complaining that you take up physical space. They are complaining that you are spread out in a way that blocks access to the space around you that you don't need. If you don't sit down and spread your knees wide enough to block access to the seats next to you, then the term manspreading doesn't apply to you.
So taking up unnecessary public space is something particular to men? Do all men do this, or just only men?
Or are we gendering bad behavior to win internet points?
Trans woman who pays a bit more attention to mannerisms than most people, both in men and women.
Picture a teenager in black sweatpants and a hoodie, on his own in a bus. That's the most common I think. It's generally men who try to project an image of strong masculinity or coolness. They don't really do it with other people because it's silly. It might be an unconscious thing, idk. It still looks stupid. It's mostly men because it's a masculinity thing.
It's great if you don't do it, and I wouldn't be surprised at all if you didn't. But there very much is a type of guy who does it. And there is no common type of woman for that specific behavior.
Doesn’t match my experience but I appreciate you sharing your perspective.
Sadly, my experience is that post-covid everyone is always rude and selfish and oblivious to others. People seem to love standing three-across on sidewalks or in doorways for a LONG time.
I just came from Costco where EVERYONE leaves their carts perpendicular across aisles regardless of their genital configuration or gender presentation.
I’m beginning to enjoy ramming them out of the way.