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@gedaliyah after a lot of thinking I decided that only two things I need available in public internet are my searxng instance and my xmpp server. the rest, like music streaming, file sharing, home automation, etc etc etc could live happily in VPN with clients on trusted devices.
this way you don't have to wake up every night to check, if some piece of software, which has access to your whole network, was pwned because of outdated leftpad version or something.
Thanks, I appreciate your experience.