ADHD

Hi Lemmy,

As the title suggested, I was kinda given soft yes and everything that my contract would get extended in the last moment I was welcomed to the news of two weeks notice. Reasoning being "unable to meet stakeholder expectations" (I pushed back few requests from a very pushy stakeholder). As an expat(international student), who just made it, I lost it all. In a moment

Here I am! I am glad I was diagnosed as an adult, but I really wish I was diagnosed as a kid (who had multiple visits to the principals office) may be I would have learnt being diplomatic more gracefully. I am just so done with my condition playing around with my life.

Parallely all my friends are empathising with me but few are insistant that I continue as an expat for more money.

I really want some wisdom from people who "know me" and understand me

Thanks!

Context: I am from India, currently working in Australia.

cross-posted from: https://piefed.blahaj.zone/c/mentalhealth/p/728220/how-often-do-you-get-like-this

I got my meds today, concerta 36 mg today and i feel like i am sitting for an exam. Mild trembles, hyper-aware and inability to sit still. Like a weaker version of caffeine for me.

From what i have seen online, caffeine, for alot of adhd ppl, works similarly to adhd meds, helping them focus. For me, it worsens my adhd, making me hyperactivity, hyper-aware and very trembles. I sort of addicted to it for 2 months or so. Drinking 4 to 5 cups a day.

Thinking about it now, this could be caffeine withdrawal rather than the meds. Either way, has anyone had similar experience?

Article without paywall: https://archive.ph/1r4ME

Original research: Mapping ADHD Heterogeneity and Biotypes by Topological Deviations in Morphometric Similarity Networks

I definitely fall into the new subtype though the emotional dysregulation also crosses over with autism.

Id like to ask opinions on what I should be asking and or telling my provider at my upcoming appt.

For context, I paid out of pocket for a psychologist evaluation as I failed to get the appropriate appointment within my insurance-it was too difficult to understand maybe.

I have informed my insurance covered providers of the diagnosis and now have an appointment in...June....to discuss ADHD and possibly be prescribed medication.

Since I have some time before the appointment Id like tonfigure out what are the prime areas of questioning and concerns relating to medication. And what if any research I should do into the medication options.

Possible red flags I may encounter? Such as prescribing too high a dose?

(I am male about 140-150lbs (63.5 to 113.4 kg) at 69 inches or 175 CM depending monthly on diet and exercise and water intake)

If anyone has experience or can help me to have a successful appointment it would be appreciated.

Is it normal to wait a month for this sort of thing for you personally in the system you are in? What system /nation is that?

Should I take the first dose on a weekend to avoid possible bad side effects preventing work? Or just right away?

Should I choose it.

I had 1 prescription, Sertraline that I ceased taking in under 72 hours due to very bad side effects of shakiness, tiredness and then inability to sleep at night time.

We have all seen those memes about how seeing people Info-dump is the hottest thing ever, but even in normal conversations listening to people talk is chore in of itself. I get bored quickly and look somewhere else or interrupt them with my own thoughts or try to predict what they are going to say.

It feels like i am more interest in myself and what i care about than what the other person has to say,who they are or what they care about.

And yes, i am aware how beyond self-centered that is and i do wish to work on that but i am also wondering if others have similar experience.

One of the big reasons I haven't gotten diagnosed for ADHD yet is that I assume they'll prescribe meds and that will create a concept called "meds" that others can bully me with. No one can tell you to take your meds if you don't have any lol.

The other reasons are that it's taken me decades to actually like myself and the thought of meds changing who I am is really scary. Then there's the scary things that come with diagnoses. What if I get misdiagnosed? What if getting diagnosed leads to rights being removed? I have a friend who was diagnosed as bipolar and they immediately removed her driving licence. What if I go to a private clinic instead and they just feed me a bunch of lies so they can charge huge fees for consults and meds? It's a minefield and I'm happy with the way I function and also, I'm generally a happy person living an nice life so why upset the apple cart?

I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Hi all I need a sanity check.

Diagnosed ADD as a kid, struggled to pay attention and care in school, was on concerta for a decade. Parents would up my dose if my grades went down and expected me to grow out of ADD once I turned 18.

That didn't happen and my life fell apart and I vowed to never take medication again because I saw it as a conspiracy to sell pills and get people messed up in the head.

After 15 years of emotional dysregulation and crippling anxiety I spoke to a dr and tried an extended release amphetamine yesterday.

My whole world changed. No emotional noise, no background feeling of "I'm a bad person and I don't know why", social anxiety is gone (was able to respond to all my messages and even make a phone call AND talk to a cashier!!!). Was able to do tasks I left behind because the anxiety to start was too bad.

I feel like I can do anything I set my mind to now. My self confidence is up. I don't dread things. I woke up calm. My mind used to be a firehose of thoughts and emotions all at max level. Now it's calm and orderly and logical.

This seems too good to be true. I didn't even know existence could be like this. Is this normal? Is it the honeymoon phase? Is it just because I'm taking an amphetamine? I'm beside myself and life feels like I've got all the cheat codes now. It seems too good to be true.

One thing about tasks and the probability that I'll take them on is the ratio:

reward* : required energy**

But faced with a task, I might remember situations where I did a thing that didn't take long but had great results, and I felt so good after doing it. That is normal, but it can also be a trap. Example:

It's late, but I do have time for a little think such as taking the garbage out or cleaning the sink. But then I think: Yes, the effort is not that great, I could do it, but what difference does it make? Might as well take on all the remaining chores tomorrow. And I don't find a task with a good reward/energy ratio, so I do nothing.

It's always a fallacy.

What works?

1. Simulate tasks in my head and see if one of them appeals; not picking any is fine as long as I simulate them, as it works often enough.
2. Just fuck it, fight back. Screw you, brain, and your dopamine hunt, I'll just do a little thing with almost no gain. Making my bed 3 hours before sleep. Getting an only 70 % full garbage back out. Clean the dust on top of the shelf that nobody sees. Take that!

*(measured in dopamine, visible results, satisfaction, ...)

**(motivation, effort, discipline, time)

I'm trying to retake the medication that I took back in high school (Concerta) so I can study for and eventually take the Comptia A+ exam. The idea being that I've a decently-paying remote job that will benefit both my wife and I. My wife, however, refuses to let me get my meds. This isn't the first we've had this conversion and every time she says the same thing: "You just need to focus naturally", "It's all in your head", "Doctors are only in it for themselves" and so on. There's no getting through to her and I'm tired of trying to get to reason with me. I think I'm going to get my meds in secret and hide them. I know that this is a bad idea but she leaves me no choice. Any advice?

I've been on slow-release methylphenidate for a while but am starting to question whether it's right for me.

The positive effects became apparent very quickly: It helps me getting started with things and finishing them, as well as being more aware of what needs to be done (i.e. taking out the trash). Instead of making me wanting to put chores and errands off it makes me almost eager for tasks and responsibilities, I suddenly want to get things done and be more reliable than I usually am.

So far so good. But I have also noticed that it sort of "untangles" my emotions in general. It makes me feel more "emotionally confident" as in: Instead of ignoring things that I need to work on regarding my mental or emotional state I'm able to perceive / feel more clearly how I feel and it also makes me less reluctant to tackle more difficult emotional matters.

Sometimes it feels like a light is being switched on inside of me and I feel like I can suddenly be or become more easily the best possible version of myself.

Which sounds great but I've also noticed that it makes me want to take my meds more often than I should. I'm on 2x20mg atm but I've noticed that I'm starting to develop a craving for my meds because of the good feeling they give me.

This makes me worry if these meds are really a good idea for me or if I should switch to something else. Has anyone else had similar experiences?

So, this is a fairly lengthy discussion.

I am active duty, for context. Generally, ADHD is at enlistment is a disqualifier, to my knowledge. I Wonder now, of my medical providers in the service saw.my symptoms and decided not to probe it or inform in an attempt to keep my record 'clean'. I did not have any inclination at enlistment to my having ADHD.

So, I suppose I am for one, complaining, and for 2 making the statement that for service members with ADHD, spec. undiagnosed, we are are far behind in identification, treatment, and care compared to private enterprise and that it is shameful and I will now make an effort to educate my peers and ensure they consider the possibility of ADHD as likely-if they have it- they are [blissfully] unaware and the system is not helping.

I've not read the whole thing- to be honest. Its just so ironic that despite the zeitgeist of highlighting the importance of mental health in the military, social media prevalence of spreading awareness amd acceptance of all kinds of disorders amd lifestyles, here we are, here I am in exactly the situation people have been warning us (the general population and the military) since COVID and maybe before.

I must also say that I am grateful in a sense. Had I not been able to enlist I do not think I would be in the socioeconomic status I am now. It is like a trade- sacrificing medical care and work accommodations for money- and sacrificing my semse of morals as well---I am not a fan of being a part of this machine amd what it does. But now I have agreed to be complicit for a while longer until retirement.

For ADHDers who were diagnosed earlier, I would be lying if I did not say I was jealous. But I am also sympathetic to you if your symptoms (or just in general) led you to dowm a rougher path without the assurance of job which undoubtedly jas built in safety-nets. I know comparrisons is not always healthy.Life is one big gamble innit?

Let's make the most of it.

I do think the military has some unique effects on ADHD, especially life aboard a boat.

• "Their findings revealed an estimated ADHD prevalence ranging between 7.6% and 9.0%, depending on the diagnostic method. Intriguingly, the highest prevalence was found not in the youngest age group (18-19 years), but rather among those aged 25-29."

• "The findings indicate a higher ADHD prevalence in military personnel than in the general population, with adult ADHD primarily manifesting as impaired executive functioning and more inattentive symptoms"

I'm in US. Every year it gets harder and harder to get my meds. Since my doc is in another state, I have to drive 80 miles to get ADHD, anxiety, and sleep meds. However, I can just get my other meds near my current house.

Also, instead of have refills on my sleep meds, they have to be prescribed by the month. It's really annoying because I drive to get them and pharmacy doesn't have them due to a mistake while interfacing with my doc. It's happened a few times now. All the docs here are insurance billing farms so I never switched any doctors when I moved.

ADHD and all comorbidities seem to create a need for meds that are harder and harder to get. Drug tests, drug shortages, sleepless nights... At this point I want to sue the DEA. (Drug enforcement agency - Sorry for American defaultism) Anyone else have these issues?

Hey everybody! I wanted to follow-up on my original post from a month ago.

A few comments suggested taking Magnesium supplements. I did more research and found other examples where magnesium appeared to help with ADHD related insomnia. Specifically Magnesium Threonate. I've been taking it for just over a month and have definitely noticed improvement.

I actually feel tired when it's getting close to bed time. I typically fall asleep within 30 minutes of laying down and sleep through the night with minimal interruptions. It's hard to quantify but if I had to guess, my sleep habits have improved by 85 - 90%.

I also feel like my emotional state is more "stable" throughout the day. Not sure if this is an effect of the Magnesium, getting adequate rest, or maybe a combination of both.

I stopped taking melatonin supplements because I think they were making me feel groggy the next day. I also stopped wearing blue light glasses since they don't seem to be necessary.

At any rate, I'm liking the results so far.

Ritalin/Concerta have served me well as an aid for ADHD for several years.

I've currently been given 3 bottles of Concerta 36mg, but it turns out that they are a bit too strong for me as the come-downs have gotten quite brutal. (Idk why my tolerance fluctuates like this, 36mg fit me well in the past). What I really need is an 18mg Concerta or a 5mg Ritalin. The problem is that my psych has shut down meaning that I'm stuck with these pills or nothing for several months.

Does anyone know if it's possible to somehow extract the MPH from the pills and consume it instant release the way you would with Ritalin?

I tried grinding down+drinking half of the inside of a Concerta pill (≈18mg), but that made me vomit as one of the compounds that usually stays inside the pill evidently irritated my GI tract. I also tried leaving a pill in tepid water for 24h in the hope it would leach the MPH the way it does in your gut (I'd then drink the appripriate portion of that), but the pill released some sort of goo which I couodn't bring myself to consume.

I am going in for the assessment I asked for, today.

Purpose of this post is primarily for me to set some realistic expectations based around the results I am increasingly ( perhaps desperately )hoping for. I have specifically asked for an Autism and ADHD assessment. Although Im quite sure about latter, the former I am really not sure about. (Sometimes I think No its not possible, other times I think 50/50, amd other times I think it absolutely must be true- lately I've been thinking maybe 30/70 its true -30 its true-70, not true-).

So....I walk in, do it amd he says no you dont have ADHD nor the other nor any other conditions not spoken of.

Perhaps you can give some words of advice for how to handle this in the most healthy way.

I suppose my first thought is...wow so Im just not trying hard enough(performance/professional/personal), im not willing enough to put myself in uncomfortable positions, (social issues) and Im not disciplined enough (routine housework/errands, exercise, hobbies, etc)

Then I have to come to terms with that for a moment and consider if I habe enough suspicion still that this assessment was simply incorrect.....and I have to find a different place.

It was hard in thr first place to ask for this because it conflicts me morally, I dont think it is right for me to say "I may have this or that or I definitely do" and so on..that is the "doctors" job. I have been getting better at refraining that thought but if this occurs then it may be resurface more starkly. I will have to rely on myself (and hopefully you all, ) to find another assessor.

Should the opposite happen, I think I am ready for it. (Opinions?)

Alternatively he says I have some condition not considered and in this case i am also not so sure. I suppose worst case scenario I am sociopath, psychopath, and or narcissistic---I have no idea how to accept that. But I know maybe I should consider it?

Anyway- just trying to make sure my expectations are set and any words of consideration are appreciated but I suppose not needed

cross-posted from: https://piefed.blahaj.zone/c/microblogmemes/p/664144/i-really-can-t

I really can't

I was using a magnet to try and find a bolt i dropped while working on my kids bike. Instead, I found the keys that went missing 1.5 years ago. No, they don't still work.

Just now, I'm standing on my porch, and I see a bird fly down to the sidewalk. She then walks across the street as fast as her little legs can take her. Once she reaches the other side, she flys off.

I laughed and thought "That's some shit I would do and have no idea why."

I suspect I have ADHD (maybe inattentive).

Never have suspected this to be true until a few months ago - I am 31 years old.

Sadly, I used to think about people who said they have ADHD were making excuses for their poor behavior or work performance. (Sorry I guess)

'Everyone has a little bit of ADHD' 'We are all a little autistic'

How do you folks deal with statements such as these? And is it possible the people saying this are undiagnosed amd projecting (like I think I was)?

Recently when someone says that I simple say 'No, (disorder x, y, z) is a (category i.e. developmental) disorder meaning the person's CNS or psyche has developed incorrectly'

Which simply yields more arguing. . .

My next question---

Background - I have struggled my whole life with life. My apartment is constantly messy save a few weeks out of the year, my insurance goes un updated and I drive illegally, I do not speak to people for days on end (family included), deadlines are almost never met, the phrase 'anything without immediate and serous consequence, is invisible and impossible to do' is very accurate to my entire life.

I have been searching for 31 years (more or less) for explanations as to why I am so much more dysfunctional than my peers

Question: Is ADHD/ADD really this debilitating, or must it be a combination of things?

Because if this ultimately explains most if not all of my difficulties, why isnt this treated as a severe disability? Because I am barely capable of doing anything if there.

Are no immediate consequence - and for many adult things- there are not.

Additional ramble- I initiated an assessment with a psychologist outside of my insurance coverage as it has been too difficult for me to navigate the system so I am paying out of pocket. I initially asked for an autism/ADHD assessment/ but after doing more learning I see autism as less likely in my case although perhaps I dont know.

I am so frustrated that at 31 years old and multiple encounters with psychologist, psychiatrists and other MDs none have ever even hinted at ADHD the most I've gotten is--mild and or moderate depression, general anxiety/social anxiety

Curious how others experience and cope with that?

How does that apply to relationships/socialnstuff?

Neurodivergent people have always been part of the engineering world. Their creativity, curiosity, pattern‑spotting and ability to hyperfocus have shaped entire industries.