JerryMerweather

Really dont know why the downvotes, does this look AI? is the bolding the reason?

I spent so much time rewriting this. Dang it.

(I was hoping I would get peoples opinion on the matter)

I thought it would look cooler, I wrote all of this because I was venting.

Which is why I wrote a summary below.

If the grammer or wording is werid, its because I tired to lessen the usage of I pronoun because it was used alot in the original diary I wrote.

My guy that is amazing!!!

Thanks for sharing, I have escaped from porn, but I have yet to stop touching myself.

Good to know things are going well for you. 🤍

manosphere, what is that?

Oh yeah, but it could also happen to some men too. Its unfortunate.

I am planning to make a post on this to read peoples opinion.

Anyway...
Not hyperfixated on it but I have been thinking about how common sexualization/pornification has become, especially on women.

It raises beauty standard to unrealistic levels, and usually makes people be ashamed of their bodies.

I have also been thinking about sexual assualts . Most victims are usually young girls and women.

Male victims are ignored, as if trauma wasnt a thing that everyone no matter the gender experiences in such crimes.

It is unfortunate that female victims usually have more consequences than male victims when it comes to sexual assualts. (They risk getting pregnant.)

The fact that porn(mostly consumed by males), movies, anime, and other forms of visual media are usually optimized( hypersexualized ) for "the male gaze".

Not mentioning the dark industry behind it that only encourages sex trafficking of innocent souls.

It makes me disgusted, am I dirty for being a male?
Why are males generally more focused on physical appearance than women?
Why is the male gaze > female gaze??

I dont know, makes me feel disgusted and ashamed of myself sometimes.

Perhaps I owe women an apology on behalf of all of the mess some men are doing.

I do realize that I am generalizing alot, and there are flaws in this thought, but I cant get it out of my head.
It's also one of the reasons that encouraged me to escape porn and the dark industry behind it

Hey dude, I dont know what OCD is, but some problems you described seem to be from a single source I would assume.

Wasting time watching porn.

If you want to have more time to spend on your hobbies, If you dont want to think and lust about aritifical porn, If you want to escape porn and get yourself busy reading something.
Then I recommend you to read this: https://easypeasymethod.org/

It helped me so much, changed my perspective around porn, and gave me more free time to use on personal hobbies.

Honestly man, give it a read!!
You will have something to busy yourself with, which I assume might relieve you from thinking about your regrets. AND will help you become a better version of yourself.

All the best dude, I hope this first step encourages you to do more.

🤍

may I know why?

Flutter is cross-platform, and its supposed to be used with dart. (flutter is a framework)

Planning to use flutter for mobile and pyqt for desktop. since I dont like depending too much on Google

I will check it out.

Yeah I know it, GDscript is similar to python. I did some lessons in it while I was trying to deduce if godot is a good choice for me or not.

I will make sure to cut in half again and one more time to make sure the scope devil doesnt come again.

I am good with python.
Perhaps I also have some experience making games, used roblox studio (~2015) before roblox was ruined and I have used gdevelop recently.

Blender is what I am learning right now. I hate how frustrating it can be.