Brown eye of Sauron...
this post was submitted on 04 May 2025
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Maybe they also like it raw and wriggling.
I'm seeing the potatoes reference with a different view now.
It’s just an ancient penis. I don’t lament the vistas of old man dick I’ve witnessed in gym locker rooms. Frankly, given what I know, they constantly had his testicles hopping back and forth in full view. The scrotum just extends so damn far as you age, and that loincloth was certainly not long enough to cover the lumpy belt hanging between his legs.
It got so long that he had to tie a knot to not step on the meatballs
Surely gollum put the ring on it at least once.
If I remember correctly the ring adjusts in size to its wearer.
That's probably what made sauron want to get the ring back. Being forced to watch that motherfucker orgasm while pounding the very reason that you are a spirit.
But real talk: do you get invisible when wearing it on the dick?
Gollum, after Sam mentions it: "What's testes, precious?"
Oh, but I will argue that the same camera cuts don't show the moments Frodo and Sam were mentioning it.
Folks, that's not loincloths work. It's a single strip of cloth that starts in the front, goes over the loop of cord, then through the legs and up over the loop of cord in the back. It's not just two flaps of fabric hanging down in the front and back.
I think of loincloths like this. Kinda like homemade tighty whities
There's a bunch of different styles, but all of them are made of a single piece of cloth and they all pass between the legs, so nobody wearing one has their bits flopping loose.
After 4 years, I would have doubled down.