Selfhosted
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nginx + certbot \ acme for certs from my local Step-CA, proper DNS & I just use a WireGuard VPN on-demand for when I leave my house. As soon as I'm off my Wi-Fi I have the VPN active so I don't need to expose anything more than 1 port for that to work =]
I might look at Tailscale, if only because I've seen plenty of people say that's how they connect, so worth looking into =]
If you want to stay fully self-hosted, look into Headscale. You could run it locally with a port open, or you could throw it on the tiniest cloud VM somewhere and have zero ports open at home.
Thanks! I'll take a look at that.