this post was submitted on 21 Apr 2026
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Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] artifex@piefed.social 98 points 1 month ago (4 children)

A word of warning: I didn't set the sqwimble right one time -- ONE TIME -- and now I'm stuck in this stupid timeline.

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 48 points 1 month ago (3 children)

They really should put the sqwimble slider behind an "advanced settings" button or menu or something

[–] Test_Tickles@lemmy.world 21 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I really miss the "I'm feeling lucky" checkbox that they used to have under the sqwimble setting.

[–] Sidyctism2@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah, though im very happy they removed it from location

[–] Test_Tickles@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Detroit. Every fucking time. There's nothing random about suddenly finding yourself in downtown Detroit in any timeline. I was never feeling the kind of lucky that you needed if you were going to be in Detroit.

[–] four@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I use the TimeWanderer GUI frontend which is much better IMO. It's still in alpha, so use it at your own risk

[–] Erusset@slrpnk.net 2 points 1 month ago

I use timeloop btw

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 month ago

You don't fuck around with sqwimble settings. That's some legacy code.

[–] Dasus@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

That setting really made me think of the time machine in this:

Blackadder Back & Forth (1999) full

For those who don't wish to enjoy the comic antics of Sir Rowan Atkinson as Blackadder and wish to just see what I'm on about, here's a link with a timestamp to when the show the interface of the machine https://youtu.be/rzHn2H2V8N4?t=390 but it'll sort of "spoil" the "movie" a bit if you watch more than 20s, it's just 33min total

[–] lauha@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

I'm still swim tumbling

[–] danekrae@lemmy.world 39 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You CANNOT set the sqwimble that high, and not also be deterministic! Are you insane?!

[–] Kernal64@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 month ago (2 children)

If you can't do it, why does the software allow it?!

[–] P1k1e@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Because it expects you to be a professional, and not some guy trying to turn George Jr. Into the next Bigfoot during 9/11.

Kids these days

[–] Kernal64@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

No one ever lets me have any fun!

[–] capt_wolf@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's because we've got all these interdimensional rando speed runners fucking with the squimble setting now! Keep it up and we're going to draw the old ones' attention.

[–] P1k1e@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Its too late.....sigh just set it to minimum and end it

[–] brem@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

Epstein Files

[–] hypnicjerk@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

user feedback has been positive

[–] expatriado@lemmy.world 25 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

escaping the present to go back to a time when a Republican president started an unnecessary war with a middle eastern country

[–] TomViolence@piefed.zip 19 points 1 month ago

I'm sorry but real programmers dream in ISO 8601.

[–] how_we_burned@lemmy.zip 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

classifiedadbacktofuture

Now OP you just gotta do a classified advert like this.

I'll join you....

[–] MonkeMischief@lemmy.today 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Push_It_to_the_Limit.wma🔊

[–] Kintarian@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Can it also teleport me to a Waffle House?

[–] NoForwadSlashS@piefed.social 10 points 1 month ago

I think that just happens by itself if you blackout

[–] Vince@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Is there a piece of media that deals with the location issue properly? Always assumed that time travel would leave you in a "fixed" point in space and you'd need to accurately figure out where exactly you want to pop out

[–] GreenShimada@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Once you get into real science where the Sun and Earth travel through space, either you have some sort of anchor device (meaning you can't go back before that anchor was made), or it's proper use of a black hole or some sort of singularity where things like lightspeed travel is already solved, and there's an established pair of terminus points.

[–] Saledovil@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

One explanation could be that the time machine is anchored to the 🌞 gravity well, so it can find the position based on where the 🌞 is. In said setting, you're also limited to only traveling whole years.

[–] GreenShimada@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

That depends on the method of time travel, which is fictional anyway. Gravity is a wave and may be a particle as well, so the same as light. So, presumably, any method of traveling through time would travel through a medium outside of the known universe, meaning that gravity may not leak into that dimension.

Though, a good example would be the HG Wells Time Machine version of time travel, where the machine doesn't leave 3D space and simply scrolls through the time dimension, tied to (presumably) the Earth's gravity well.

If you based it on the Sun's gravity well, the Earth moves around the Sun at 30km a second. So what you really have is a great way to explore the solar system by placing yourself at points in time that create gravity slingshots to send you anywhere with no fuel. But you do need a spaceship. If you miscalculate the Earth's orbit by 1 second, you'd be at the edge of space or in the Earth's mantle so deep no one would ever find you, so the safest place to stop would be in orbit.

[–] rockerface@lemmy.cafe 10 points 1 month ago

You can't define a "fixed" point in space without using something as reference. Might as well use the Earth.

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago

The John Titor writers/hoaxers said that the Time Machine had two quantum singularities. They added the second one to lock the travel to earths gravitational field after their testing put the machines miles away

[–] Klear@quokk.au 5 points 1 month ago

There is no "fixed" point in the universe. Everything is relative. A time-travel story that takes into account the motion solar system around the galaxy or somesuch is trying to be clever but actually fails science harder than the naive "same location on Earth" approach.

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago

Don't forget to bring a plumbus!

[–] GreenShimada@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

You know, for TimeWindows95, it recommended a Sqwimble value based on the date and how many birds might be the area at the time you picked. It was usually 7 or 9.

Set it to 20 once and that's how I ended up not being a twin anymore.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 month ago

No! I'm not falling for this again!

Fool me once ... !

[–] Bluescluestoothpaste@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Fml i didn't quit reddit to come here and see old reddit posts

[–] village604@adultswim.fan 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is a Reddit alternative so I'm not sure what you were expecting.

I was expecting alternatives to old reddit posts lmao

[–] its_kim_love@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Make sure you use the right bush.

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Seems like elevation might be important to…

[–] deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Nah. With Lat/Long elevation can just be clamped to the local surface maxima.

Given the temporal resolution is 24 hours, you don't want to try to time travel into an aircraft, you could miss by up to 12 hours. You could maybe dial that in by trail and error via sqwimble setting but if you go that route you probably shouldn't assume form.